“Part of that merry-go-round almost inevitably includes those ALWAYS, NEVER AND EVERYTHING words. Think about that. How does it serve you or your partner to say these words? Are they true?” p.77 Get Out of the Box and Into Play
So many couples play this game with each other. It does not serve you or your partner to make the absolutes. There are very few actions that are always and never. I always pee each day. I do not always pee at the same time every day. Using these words only serves to hurt. What I find is that when these words are being used, there is a very strong need to be right. That need to be right is divisive in ANY relationship. So…you may ask…what do you say instead?
As so many times before……
DOES IT NEED TO BE SAID?
DOES IT NEED TO BE SAID BY ME?
DOES IT NEED TO BE SAID BY ME RIGHT NOW?
Post this everywhere in your home! Say to yourself…I do not have to be right. I can express my feelings to my partner without attacking.
To find more tools for better communication buy my book, Get Out of the Box and Into Play.
Master Relationship Coach