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What Other Couples Say?

Noticing the responses from “other people” on social media is astounding. I have seen others very freely decide that a person needs to end their relationship. I have read that they flat out tell people to get a divorce. My question to you is this….do you know this person? And yet another question…Does that person have all of the information about your relationship? How then do you leave into the hands of this stranger, the decisions that you are about to make. In the south we have an expression, “I don’t know you!” That is a declaration of mind your own business. Please listen to me when I tell you this.

You do not know the people on social media.
They do not have your best interest at heart.
Those people do not care about who you are and what your hopes and dreams are.
It is easy to tell others what to do.
Telephone calls or live conversations are so much better.

What other people say about your relationship is none of their business unless you ask. Did you ask? I am a staunch proponent of privacy. If you put your relationship problems on one of those relationship groups or on a public post then you are asking for ANYONE’S OPINION. Read that again. Let me help you a little with this.

Jenny gets really angry with her husband for spending too much money this month. She had planned for a certain amount to be put into the vacation fund for the two of them to go on a cruise together. This is the post:

My husband is an asshole and doesn’t care about how much money he spends on himself. All he thinks about is what he wants. He doesn’t care about me or his family.

The response:
You should divorce him.
He is a narcissist.
Tell him to get out.
You don’t need this asshole

Clearly this is not what is going on in Jenny’s relationship. She is just venting to anyone who will listen to her. Social media is not your girlfriend or your buddy. Pick up the phone and talk to a human being or make a date for coffee with your real friends. The fallout of this comment is that Jenny’s husband sees this and doesn’t understand why she would post such a thing on social media and his trust is broken. Jenny has failed to talk with her husband about how she feels or even bounced this off of a trusted friend. She has made this very public and has hurt her husband, her family, his family and herself.

Please! Stop thinking that those strangers on social media care about you and your family!

Master Relationship Coach
Kari Petruch

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