Couples sometimes get caught up in the little living things in their relationships. Some couples have come to me and have carried those little resentments for years. Does this sound familiar to you? Are you still harboring a resentment that your husband does not take out the trash unless you ask him to? Do you still get angry over the way the toilet paper sits on the holder? What about the fact that the tool that was used was not put back where you want it to be? These are truly little things. I understand that these little things may seem like really big things in your life but they are not.
When your relationship with your loved one matures, you will understand that none of this matters. Here are some of the solutions to those little things.
Toilet seat- Dear love, if you leave the toilet seat up and I go to the bathroom in the middle of the night, I will sit on the cold hard porcelain and maybe fall in the water.
Toilet paper roll-Decide together. Over or under. Everytime.
Toothpaste-Each has their own.
Clothing separation-He who does the laundry has the say.
Trash-She who takes out the trash makes the decision.
As you can see…the list could go on and on. Carrying these resentments are destructive to your relationship. If you see that something needs to be done then do it. It is amazing how much power this has. My husband slept in a bit one day and the trash people were coming that day. I noticed that the trash wasn’t put out. Instead of waking my husband, I took a few steps and put the garbage out. When he woke up, he said, “Oh crap, I forgot to put the garbage out!” The trash people had already come. I lovingly looked at him and said, “That’s okay honey. I knew that you were sleeping in a bit this morning so I took the garbage out. It would be great if you could bring the cans back into the garage.” I received lots of kisses and love from my husband that day. Believe me when I tell you that we are a partnership just as you are in your relationship.
Know that you are a team and you are there for each other!
Master Relationship Coach
Kari Petruch
