Are you afraid to speak for yourself? When people are afraid to stand up for themselves they will give reasons for not doing so. There was a woman who was so afraid of speaking up that she couldn’t even speak about what she wanted at a restaurant. The conversation with the wait staff was this:
Server: What would you like to eat today?
Woman: I don’t know. What would you suggest? (I really like the chicken.)
Server: The filet mignon is nicely wrapped in bacon with a mushroom sauce poured over.
Woman: What do you think? (I should get what she suggests.)
Server: I think that would be lovely.
Woman: Ok. I will have that. (I really wanted the chicken.)
Server: How would you like that prepared? (I like my steak medium.)
Woman: What do you think? (She would know better than I.)
Server: Is medium rare good for you?
Woman: Yes. (No, but she is so busy and I don’t want to bother her.)
This woman took on the challenge of beginning to state what she wanted at restaurants. This small beginning led her to be able to speak for herself in other areas of her life. Over time, she grew and overcame her fears. She is a public speaker today. This too was one of her greatest fears. You can overcome all of this to become the person you were always intended to be. Speak for yourself just because of who you are and for no other reason!
This very thing can happen in relationships. Do you tell your partner how you feel or are you afraid of your partner’s reaction to your feelings? When your partner asks you what is wrong, do you reply with the word “nothing”? Do you expect your partner to read your mind or just know what you are upset about? If you are doing this…STOP! This is insanity. Speak up! Tell your partner how you feel or what is bothering you. Change your expectation to one of love and intimacy. Intimacy is about taking risks with each other so that you can become closer as a couple.
The Relationship Reigniter
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